~~ i just wanna redo everything

after all, my depression wasnt really over i guess..i'm not sure is it the real feelings or just the hormones talking.. but, i cant always blame my hormones..

or maybe i'm missing my family so darn much that anything here seems so wrong..this morning i dreamt about my family..i was at home with my sibs..khodijah,luqman,zainab,abdul rahman,sumaiyyah,safiyyah, and muaz..we were so happy..sharing the laughters, exchanging stories and having a superb priceless time together...then suddenly i woke up..i saw my black fan stood straight in front of me..then only i realised i was just dreaming......devastated, i shed few tears without no one knowing..my room is deserted with me all alone whereas my besties from other house, there were all back home to malaysia..its making me confined in boredom and lonesome....to make things worse,only few hours before, the other half of me dropped the bombshell...i dont think its appropriate to write it here what's the big thing, but the truth was really hard to swallow..and, honestly,my heart shatters to millions pieces only Allah knows how i felt...it would take ages to mend my fragile heart and it would never be the same again.. :-(

deep inside, i somehow wish i could turn back time...but i'm just a human..